Goals, Setbacks, Progress, etc....

**Disclaimer:  This post is entirely for me... something to look back at later**

I've mentioned plenty that Ryan and I are pretty active in keeping a fit and healthy lifestyle.

We eat well, and lead active lives, as well as working hard towards our fitness goals.

Ive been discouraged and dealing with a lot of aggravation over my lack of progress in this area.

Some of it is my lack of mental power... "I can't"  "I'm too tired"  "It's too heavy"...

and some of it is real... I have a pinch in my lower back that is causing me lots of grief, as well

as a very weak/unstable left shoulder I can't quite seem to correct.

I get frustrated with Ryan, simply because he doesn't suffer the same setbacks or barriers, which is entirely displaced and not at all valid.  He eats cleaner and more consistent than I do... he works out harder and more frequently than I do... and he's got a crazy amount of mental toughness which pushes him to keep going even when he doesn't want to.  So it shouldn't ever surprise me when he looks like a million bucks and consistently makes gains.  

It's easy for me to see my flaws, my inconstancies, and my lack of forward momentum... but I'm trying.  Lately, I've done a few things that have helped my perception of myself... I've hit a couple Personal Bests, I've looked in the mirror and SEEN change, and I've spoken with a few people that have been brutally honest with me and told me things that maybe I just didn't want to hear before. Or maybe heard, but didn't believe and couldn't process.  

Basically... I'm good.  I'm doing enough.  I can't continue to beat myself up for moving forward slower than someone else... 

because I'm still moving forward.  I'm still better than I was before.  

My fastest run... I've done only a handful of runs this spring, and surprised myself
with my pace during this one.  I was exhausted and happy when I finished!

Not sure what is going on with my hair

*I was practicing my cleans - 95lbs, nothing heavy, just working on technique*

*Ryan urged me to try a 20b increase and I was really upset because I missed it.

I nearly cried with frustration, but he kept me collected and I dropped a little

weight, but still PR'd by 10lbs... Not pretty, but managed a 225lb deadlift.*

Spring Randomness

Here is some Spring Randomness... because it's 2am, and I'm tired, and trying to make a post

with sense, and flow... well, just forget it.

~If you haven't already noticed... Lila has taken up Rugby.  Her smile is pretty amazing!~

~Playing "Restaurant" is super fun.  Plastic sandwiches are delicious, and air tea is the absolute BEST!~

Oh, and you have to Sign in too.. don't forget that part!

~Apparently it was National Sibling Day.  I love my Sissy!~

~Elaina is hilarious and adorable~

~We went to the Pinewood carnival, and it was all kinds of carnival joy and madness!~ 

~The girls had their dance pictures taken... even though they don't love dance,
pictures were fun for them and they liked getting into their pretty costumes!~

~This is how Rio likes to wake me up~

Woof

~Lila is growing up ridiculously fast.  Seriously.  She needs to knock that shit off!~

she's weird though.  :)

~We had Kindergarten Roundup for Ellie, and she was so excited to go to school and know that it was all for HER!...
again, Seriously needs to stop growing up so damn fast!~

~Ryan did a bunch of major projects around the house... strip, wash, and stain the deck and porch, tear up our old oak flooring in the entryway, kitchen, and main floor bath, and replace them with tile in entry, and new hardwood in kitchen, as well as putting tile down in our laundry room!  It's been a construction zone in our house, but it looks great now!  Thanks baby... as always, you amaze me!~

tearing up the entry way

I grouted the tile... it was my contribution to the projects!  nice grouting, right?!

kitchen floor - Before

kitchen floor - After

There are a few more things I'll touch on another time, but that's enough for now!  

Happy Monday everyone!

Our Beautiful 5 Year Old Elaina Grace

Our baby is 5.

I have no idea how that happened

When did I blink and my tiny little bird of a baby turn into a beautiful, spunky,

sassy, smart, little girl with a personality far too big for her small body?!!

Elaina is beautiful.  Truly.

She is feisty for sure, but in her heart, she is a kind soul.  She is witty and full

of light, and enough fire to give me full confidence she will go very far in this world!

We celebrated her Birthday a few days early this year, as it's been very hectic around the house. 

As usual, just a small gathering of family to share in her day.  We grilled burgers, had cake

and ice cream, and watched her open her few presents.  Thank you to everyone that stopped by, it's very special to us that we have family willing to share our celebration with us!  That night, Ryan had an event to go to,  so I took her and Lila to see the new Cinderella movie.  So much fun to be able to start doing these kinds of things with the girls!!

Monday night (her last day of 4) was a bit emotional for me.  

As per my usual, I feel sentimental and nostalgic for the years so quickly gone by.  I remember

her birth and the emotions I had at that time.  This year, as I tucked Ellie in, she asked to see

photos from the night she was born.  We laid in bed together and looked at them, and I felt the 

same raw emotion I did 5 years ago.  Elle, being Elle, just patted my back when she saw my tears

and said "it's ok mama, I will always be your baby... I just have to get a little bigger".  

Then I gave her a massage at her request, and kissed her sweet head.  

I had to work that night, but was able to snuggle her and kiss her to sleep, just what this mama needed!

On Tuesday (her actual birthday), we had orange chicken from Big Bowl (her fav) and gave her

her gifts from us.  Very small, very simple, but we sang and I bought a fancy cupcake at Byerly's

for her with a candle, which sadly, she decided to pass on, and blew out the candle only to oblige me.

"But Mom, we already celebrated... why do I have to do it again?!" (She is SOOO Ryan's kid!)

They grow up so fast!  5 years gone... what will happen the next time I blink?

joyful tears the minute she arrived 

Happy April 5th

Easter came and went rather quickly for our family.  

It was here before we were ready and gone before we blinked.

Relatively mellow and laid back, it was a pretty enjoyable weekend!

I made suggestion that we get started on a few of our house "To-Do" projects, 

one including redoing the flooring in our entryway and kitchen....

Well, more on this later... but I will say this...

"Exercise caution when suggesting a project or task to a Volovsek man..."

Just saying.

Anyway, the morning was enjoyable... the girls were, of course, very excited

to see what the Bunny left in their baskets, and go hunting for eggs!  We had

a relaxed morning and spent some time in the afternoon at my mom's with her 

side of the family!

Here are a few pics from our Egg-events!

As for the rest of the weekend, that post will come later!

The Toothless Wonder